


Clark and the Real Girl

by Tvieandli



Category: Superman (Comics), World's Finest (Comics)
Genre: Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-26
Updated: 2013-01-26
Packaged: 2017-11-27 01:01:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 382
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/656291
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tvieandli/pseuds/Tvieandli
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It was probably Bruce that played the prank. Clark just couldn’t think of anyone else with the money, and resources to do it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Clark and the Real Girl

The package was taller than he was. Which was saying something because, by earth standards, he was considered very tall. It was plain, and wooden, and rectangular. It didn’t have any markings on it, but that wasn’t the strange part.

The strange part was that it was lined with lead.

He signed for it at around 1:30 in the afternoon, and declined the offer of help getting it into his apartment, instead opting to do it himself. He lifted tanks on a regular basis, this couldn’t be too hard. Not that he would tell the delivery guy that.

Once he had the thing situated in his living room, he read over the paper that came with it. A simple note with out any DNA on it. Odd. The ink didn’t lead him anywhere either as it was bargain brand, rather commonly used too. The same stuff they printed the Daily Planet with.

“I hope you enjoy this gift” was all it said. There wasn’t a signature, and it wasn’t hand written.

Clark laughed at the that thought the person behind this had momentarily entertained the idea of using letters cut out of magazines.

He listened to the box, pressing his ear against the wood and closing his eyes, letting his ears zero in on it’s contents. Nothing.

He sniffed the box, focusing on the smell, making sure it didn’t reek of chemicals or anything else that could be dangerous. Nothing.

He shook the box. The shifting of cardboard against something that sounded like latex and fabric. Harmless enough.

He opened the box, pushing his fingers beneath the top and prying. The side came away with a cracking sound, and Clark was pushed down by a shower of-

Tenga Eggs?

He heard the sound of air dragging along something roughly the size and shape of a human, and grunted when another weight landed on him.

He pushed upward, through the sea of Tenga Eggs, so that his hands wrapped around thin “arms”. It was lighter than a human, and it was definitely shaped like a woman. It smelled like latex, fake hair, and overly sterile clothes.

He opened his eyes, and found himself face to face with a Real Doll that was designed and dressed to look like Lois Lane.

“Oh fuck.”


End file.
